I have never been one of those people who comes up with deep insight but I have recently realized that I have some interesting perspectives on a couple of different things. I have figured out that rarely can anyone actually say I screwed up (including myself) and while that isn't new to most people I am amazed at how it is still true. People mess up and blame it on others so much so that they end up damaging others' self-esteem. Let me just say when you are struggling to have any self-esteem it is hard to have others sit there and blame their problems on you. I know I can never get away from this guilt as it occurs to everyone but I just wish I could find away around it where I could let it go and not let it bother me so much. I guess it's because I try so hard in certain areas in my life and yet.... to no avail if there is any problem it is all my fault. I know that I am not perfect and guess what... I probably did screw up part of the time in this instance but it isn't all my fault.
How does a person get self-esteem when they can't find anything that is worth feel good about? I know this might seem like a downer but it is just what is going through my head. I guess all I can do right now is give all this confusion up to God and hope that he will help me. I just want to know that everything isn't my fault all the time. That would be a good feeling! I guess I am just going to have to take it in baby steps. One thing at a time and one day at a time.
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Hey beautiful! You are one of the most amazing people I know. I wish you saw yourself the way others do. Often times, Trenton tells me when someone makes me feel guilty for something that wasn't my fault, not only is it my low self-esteem that takes it on, but it's the other person's low self-esteem that causes them to dish out the guilt. We hope you two are doing well and appreciate your thoughts and prayers. Hopefully, we'll be able to get to the ville in the next few months. I don't have your email anymore because I switched schools, just leave it on my blog sometime. We're doing ok. We don't have the answers, but we do know we're in God's hands and that's comforting. Love you!
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